Dear Leader Implies Westwood is Not Great, Makes Music Gaffe

by Neil Dewar, Editor-in-Chief

Our Dear Leader and new principal of Westwood High School gave us a grand farewell speech for the weekend. While the speech was a generic one expectable of a generic fascist autocrat, our Dear Leader either made a gaffe or revealed something about how he really feels about our school.

During the speech, our Dear Leader mentioned something he may have possibly already said several times earlier in the week. Our Dear Leader wants to 'make Westwood great again'. Evidently our Dear Leader does not currently believe our school is currently great.

This declaration is similar to those made by several politicians, such as ones made by Rick Perry to 'make America great again'. And we are just as outraged to hear our Dear Leader imply Westwood High School is no longer great as we are to hear a supposedly America-loving politician imply America is no longer great.

In addition to this possible gaffe (it may be what unser Führer genuinely believes), he also closed his pseudo-inspirational speech with Bruce Springsteen's 'The Rising'. Here it is for our readers unfamiliar with the song:



Now, we at the Press find no fault with Springsteen. Springsteen is an excellent paragon of the American ethic. No, we find fault with our Dear Leader's use of this particular song, and if you know the meaning behind this song, it will be evident. Here are some of the lyrics:

Can't see nothin' in front of me
Can't see nothin' coming up behind
I make my way through this darkness
I can't feel nothing but this chain that binds me
Lost track of how far I've gone

How far I've gone, how high I've climbed On my back's a sixty pound stone
On my shoulder a half mile of line
[...]
Left the house this morning
Bells ringing filled the air
Wearin' the cross of my calling
On wheels of fire I come rollin' down here
[...]

Now, this song (along with the rest of Bruce Springsteen's album The Rising) is about 9/11. Specifically, if you take a look at the lyrics, it's about a fireman in 9/11. The refrain, 'Come on up for the rising', could be either or both the fireman ascending a tower and him ascending to the afterlife.

Congratulations, mein Führer. You used a song quite possibly about a fireman dying during 9/11 to end your pseudo-inspirational speech. Classy.